Day Five: The last time you rode your horse and what you did
So I wanted to get a picture of me riding the Pinto, but it was too warm for a coat so you get a stock photo from this summer when I showed him in hand.
So as you all know I am in a total mental block right now when it comes to riding. Everything was going great last summer and fall and then all of a sudden this winter I lost my nerve. I stopped having fun, yet I wanted so badly to improve my riding that I kept pushing, and pushing until one day I didn’t want to ride anymore. I kept pushing myself anyway until I had a mental break down on horseback. A few weeks ago I was at a total loss and not even sure if I wanted to ride anymore.
I am happy to report that I rode this weekend. Both days! Yay. I am sticking to my plan of not riding the SchoolMaster so it was a nice treat to mess around on my friends Pinto. I had a bit of a break down on Saturday. You see, I rode defensively. On a perfectly sensible, sweet horse. My friend was so nice to let me borrow her horse and here I was still having issues. At the end of the ride she opened the doors to let us go for a stroll and cool out, and all of a sudden a smile appeared on my face. For the first time in months I was HAPPY to be on the back of a horse.
After that nice relaxing cool out I got off, and got sad again. I was relived that I still found joy in riding, but utterly depressed of how I found it. I was only happy hacking out, the one thing I CAN’T DO right now because it is not like you can go grab a horse and ride out. I spent Saturday throwing myself yet another pity party. I decided that maybe my mental block right now is dressage? My trainer and I talked and she thinks that I might be on to something. I have been riding with her on and off for 14 years (half my life) and she pointed out that every once and a while I start to take things too seriously, then I freak out, I go do something else and then when I am ready I go back to dressage.
As I have mentioned 100 times before, dressage is really hard to me. Maybe this melt down is just my way of telling myself to take a break. I am the kind of person that thinks about things a lot. This might be my brains way of asking for a break to process things when it comes to dressage. I started riding the SchoolMaster a year ago and I have learned a lot. I think my riding has gotten much more consistent and I have also learned a ton of new movements which I can use on any horse I ride now. I found that out first hand when I asked the Pinto for a shoulder in on Saturday.
My last ride was on the Pinto on Sunday, and that was the one that threw a wrench in the plans. You see, it was fun. The whole thing was fun! I rode outside and I had a great time from the start all the way through to the end. So maybe it isn’t dressage at all? Maybe it really is the SchoolMaster? Or maybe just riding inside is not for me? I don’t really know anymore. What I do know is that I need to do something different. I get to borrow the Pinto for another weekend or two (my friend is doing me a favor by letting me ride her horse so I don’t want to over stay my welcome if you know what I mean) and then I have to figure out what is next.
My trainer doesn’t have another horse for me to ride at the moment, so whatever my next step is it is going to be a change. Change is so scary! It is good for me though. I know that whatever is meant to be will be. Do I want to keep riding dressage? Should I try Saddle Seat again? Or maybe Hunters? I wish I lived in an area where there was reining around because I would totally try that. I have been holding this half halt for weeks now! What on earth is going to be my next movement?!?!?! My trainer has a friend who has a horse just sitting in the field at the moment. She is looking for someone to get the horse fit for her. I am going to go out and try the horse not this weekend but next weekend. I just want to feel the joy of riding again!
If you come to the conclusion that it is the dressage that’s freaking you out…move on to something else for awhile. I used to ride saddle seat and found it fun! But for now-hacking out might just be the mental break you need. Thank goodness for friends who lend nice horses out, eh?
Not to be rude, but why do you feel the need to be in a discipline? What’s wrong with trail riding? You can still work on arena things, wether it be inside or out, but you don’t have “that” pressure to always have to be judged on if you get it right or not. There are no rules for trail riding except to have a good time with your horse. There are competitions for the trail riders as well if you want to compete in something. I love riding trails and enjoying nature up close, wether it be with friends or by myself. Take a break from all the rules and criticism and just enjoy being one with a horse naturally. -I sincerely hope you find your happiness
Maybe you’re onto something. That would be good.
Hope the horse you’re going to check out works for you. That would be cool. Anything to put the fun back in riding because if it’s not fun, why bother.
I think you’d love the barn where I board. All ranch horse & reining folks
Even with my Aussie saddle, Grif & I still get labeled (affectionately) as an English pair – LOL.
I think it’s a great idea to just let your hair down so-to-speak and just focus on having FUN for awhile rather than pursueing any specific discipline. Find a horse that you can ride simply for the fun of it…..trail ride, do a costume class, a fun show….experiment with different tack…western? …saddleseat? …bareback?
Have you ever given any thought to just finding an old, retired showhorse or trailhorse
to lease….maybe just for the summer? Something to play on
I have also been wondering a little if the schoolmaster isn’t a little burned out with his job as well. From previous posts you have written, you have implied he gets ridden and used quite a bit….maybe he’s also just a little mentally fried and you are just not meshing right now. It’s not his fault — or yours…..you are still a good rider. I’d be a bit curious to know how the two of you would do if he got a little break from being ridden so much (by different people)????
Yes! Trail riding is so good for the soul. With a group of calm sane riders and horses there is nothing like it. Next for myself, my husband and I want to go camping with our horses. I’m so excited! I love camping and with the horses will be so much fun. Our neighbor is off camping /trail riding every weekend in the summer.
You love horses so much and so do I. I just want to be with my horse all the time. Imagine being with your horse overnight and for a few days. Awesome! I would love one of those European barns that is attached to the house. Try something different. If you love competion there is endurance riding where I gather you compete against yourself.
I’m in favor of whatever form of riding gives you pleasure. I don’t think the Schoolmaster is a fun ride. Like I said before, right rider, wrong horse.
May I email you? trbauman@comcast.net
Come ride my Jupiter! He is doing so well. Very relaxed and sensible. Seriously…Any time!